So, when it comes to manifesting what we want, most times people think of what they have to create and less of what they need to let go of.
But letting go is often SO important to make space AND to get into alignment.
Today, in my Twin Soul journey, I was thinking about what the stuff is I need to let go of for me to manifest that next level.
When we were still talking about whether our lives would align if we would choose to be together, he shared with me that he might need a couple of months to be truly ready for our next step. That was really difficult for me to hear. I already KNEW we were meant to be together at that moment. I just felt it in my heart.
BUT I also KNOW how reality creation works. So I looked BEYOND the reality of what was created there, and I looked within MYSELF.
I asked myself: “Where am I responsible for this not happening? On what level am I stopping this?”
And I instantly knew.
Because what I wanted from him was the security that he would choose for me. I didn’t want to end up alone.
At that moment I felt that to affirm what I wanted, I HAD to let go of my relationship with Bob. I KNEW what I had with my Twin Soul was the connection I wanted to create in my life, and by holding on to Bob, I held on to “security.” (BTW: I had NO idea back then that we could be Twin Souls, the thought NEVER crossed my mind until he went away after it being SO perfect between us. That’s when people said to me: “It could be a Twin Soul connection Maartje, and you have entered the separation stage.” Then I slowly started to see that could be totally true.)
But anyway: by holding on to Bob, I affirmed the belief that a relationship like that would never happen for me.
That realization came in a flash. And as soon as I realized it, I felt ONLY freedom, although I had NO securities WHAT so ever. At that moment I was truly free.
So that night I told Bob that I wanted to end the relationship.
I didn’t do that so my Twin Soul would be ready for that next step. Because I FULLY believed it, when he said that he needed a couple of more months. I did it for ME.
I did it to give MYSELF permission to make space for what I TRULY desired.
At THAT moment I was 100% willing to spend the rest of my life alone if it would never happen. But at least, then I would give myself a CHANGE to experience what I wanted to experience.
And 3 days later my Twin Soul WAS ready for that next step and he kissed me, and it was the BEST thing ever haha.
It’s funny when I think about our journey together because now I can see that a lot of steps that were huge for me, went the same way:
I wanted something. I had to give myself permission for what I wanted. I got in a conflict between what my Soul wanted and what my Ego said was or wasn’t possible. Eventually, I connected with my Soul desire and started OWNING it.
I cleared the blocks within myself, and let go of everything that was not aligned with it happening AND let go of ANY expectation of it ever happening, and a couple of days (sometimes weeks) later, it happened.
So letting go is ALWAYS a step in manifesting what you want.
And sometimes the ego struggles SO hard to hang on.
For me, the next step in our journey now is Union. Yes, physical Union with HIM, but also Union with MYSELF. I think those 2 go hand in hand. So for that to happen, there are a couple of things I need to let go of. This is what I wrote down about it. I hope it inspires you to see what YOU want to manifest in your life and make a list for yourself to see what you need to let go of.
I need to let go of:
* The judgments I have around what I am feeling and going through. I am normally a pretty strong person. I have been taught that you have to push away feelings. I thought I healed that. But normally I don’t have a lot of feelings anymore. Things usually don’t upset me that quickly. The first one and a half week that he was out of my life were also not that hard. There were a couple of tears and some processes to work through, but nothing major. The last one and a half week were tougher. I even experienced some dark night of the soul moments where I experienced an overwhelming purging of old, stagnant feelings, sadness, anger, and deep, deep fears. I haven’t shared about that a lot, because of my own judgments around it, but do know that this process isn’t all easy for me.
The ONLY thing I can do is to just surrender to it and let it all come out until there is nothing left to come out anymore. I KNOW this is serving me. I know it’s just my ego hanging on to stuff that needs to go in order for me to be whole. But it’s NOT always easy.
* I also need to let go of my judgments around this whole Twin Flame stuff.
I can compare it to discovering the Law of Attraction for the first time. I thought it was COMPLETE bullshit. I felt the same way about the Twin Flame stuff when I first heard about it.
ALL I ever have been taught in life was that there is nothing outside of what you can see. It took a couple of wake up calls to really start to surrender to the idea that there was more and that we DO in fact create our own reality.
Even when I DID believe in the Law of Attraction and I was studying it for more than 12 years, when I started my blog, it STILL felt vulnerable to talk about it. I was really scared that people might judge me.
But you know what? I am a smart, successful and conscious person. I just CAN’T deny what I am experiencing here and what my intuition tells me. It’s REALLY not something I am making up. Just as I didn’t made up The Law of Attraction 18 years ago. Or that it was all just a fairy tale inside of my head.
* I need to let go of Bob on a deeper level. This was always what I was afraid of and why I was holding on to him: That he would move on quicker than me and that I would end up alone. Because I KNOW he is an amazing guy!
It happened a couple of times before that I was in love with someone else during our relationship. And Bob was there for me when I was done experiencing what I needed to experience. I always just fell back in the comfort and safety that he provided for me.
But now, it’s really no longer an option for me to be with him in that way. I really made a commitment with myself to see this true FULLY. I OWE it to myself.
He is already chatting with other women and going on dates and stuff, and I AM alone (Well, not really of course, but some moments it feels that way.) This afternoon I felt the pull of what I USED to do: claiming him again. But I just felt it, and we talked about it a little bit, and it was ok for me. I want him to be happy, and I know I will get through this too.
* The Illusion that my Twin Soul and I are in ANY way separated. We are STILL connected on a Soul level, although we are not talking right now. And that Soul connection will never go away. It’s ONLY a matter of time and letting go of everything that keeps me (and him) from FULLY being in Union with ourselves before physical union will be a fact. And also excepting that physical union might never happen, but that’s another point.
* The thought that I don’t know what’s going on inside of him. I know EXACTLY what’s going on inside of him because we are ONE and I can just start to trust that strong inner knowing now. AND I also listened to a LOT of Law of Attraction and Twin Soul material and gotten a lot of insights around the Divine Masculines perspective. That helps too 🙂
* The illusion that I am not worthy enough or not good enough or the fear that it will be taken away from me again IF it happens. I can let that go too and just trust that everything is happening and will happen for a reason.
* The illusion that I NEED him in order to be happy. There is a difference between “needing” it to happen and wanting it to happen 🙂
* The expectation of it ever happening. And I feel this is the most difficult one for me right now. In any step, it was SO much easier than in this step. But I think I am making it difficult because I am looking at this in a different way. Because it only feels hard when I see it as a “normal” relationship and if I come from the perspective that he has moved on and for me there is so much stuff to go through.
But this is how I looked at it when I manifested our first kiss, and I think I need to look at it in EXACTLY the same way now:
I KNEW it would happen. I knew it was just a matter of time. I thought: If for ANY reason, this might never happen, I will deal with it when it gets to that point OR when I feel my intuition tells me to move on. And then I trust that someone else will come along. But I always knew it was him. I wasn’t aligning with anybody else to come along or to kiss me.
What I did this last week, was sometimes writing or telling myself that it also could be someone else. But that is REALLY not what I feel in my heart. It’s also NOT what I felt back then.
I had this conversation with Bob this morning. I said: “It’s kind of strange that I did that. It was JUST to protect myself. To NOT get disappointed if he doesn’t come back or to not put too much pressure on him. But imagine I also did this with my business. That I would say: I KNOW and FEEL that I need to teach people about manifesting. BUT of course, I am not 100% sure that it will work out. I don’t exactly know where my alignment will take me in the future. So I am not focussing entirely on my Law of Attraction business. I will just align with business in general and maybe start some side business like a marketing business and an MLM business.
No, that would be CRAZY.”
I KNOW what kind of business I want to have, so I just commit myself to manifesting that. And if for ANY reason it doesn’t work out, I will see what needs to happen THEN. And I always know that when things don’t work out, it’s ONLY because something better is on its way.
And if it would EVER happen (Can’t imagine it now, but you never know) that this is NO longer the business I need to run, than the Universe shows me the path I DO need to follow.
I DON’T need a plan B right now, because I KNOW what I want and I KNOW what the Universe is calling me to do.
A plan B would only come because I am afraid to not FULLY step into my purpose and my business and I am just NOT afraid to do that.
And it’s the same with the Twin Soul manifesting. EVERYTHING inside me feels that I STILL just ONLY want to be fully committed to this process with HIM.
I don’t WANT or NEED a “plan B” and if there will EVER be a moment for a different direction, I trust that the Universe will reveal it to me. But that is NOT now.
I never gave up on us moving to the next level. I was detached from WHEN it would happen or IF it would happen, but I didn’t let go of the desire itself.
I also shared with him honestly what I felt and where I was at, honoring his space at the same time. I can’t really talk to him right now, but maybe he reads my blogs, and he will know where I stand.
Maybe it’s a little strange for him to read all of this. (So, IF you are reading this: I am sorry if I am making you feel uncomfortable in any way. I hope you know that is not my intention. This just helps me to keep sain and work through it all AND help people in the process. I am seeing that a LOT of people who are also separated from the one they love (OR from ANY other Soul Desire they have!) are having a REALLY hard time, so if these blogs will help them to make it a little easier, it’s worth it for me. I hope for you too.
I also know you always really valued my honesty and openness, so I trust that hasn’t changed. And in order to create A TRUE connection with people, openness and honesty are the MOST important things. And I know how important connecting with people is for you also, so I trust you will understand.)
I still feel it’s going to happen between him and me. (Ok, now it suddenly feels REALLY strange to write about him instead of TO him haha. But I will just carry on.)
It’s JUST a matter of time. And maybe in ANY other relationship, this would have been seen as “desperate” or whatever, but that isn’t the case when it comes to a Twin Soul relationship. You can’t apply the same 3D relationship rules to this kind of relationship, because it IS different.
And ALL I am doing is honoring my own alignment, regardless of what other people might think of it OR how “improbable” it seems or EVEN the fact that he said he doesn’t want to be with me OR even TALK to me.
If I would have given up my business EVERY time a client turns me down or people wouldn’t believe in me or if I experience setbacks, I would have NEVER gotten where I am today. So that is also NOT what I am going to do now.
And In the meantime, I just keep living my life and doing my business and working on Union with myself.
I always know that our outer reality is a reflection of our inner reality. So I always know that I can do the inner work for things to shift pretty quickly.
And if I will ever feel that my desire or my alignment might change, then I will align with that new plan or desire. But NOW is not the time.
So, that feels really good and totally in alignment.
And I feel a LOT of space now.
I hope it inspires you to make a list of yourself to see what you need to let go of.
And of course, keep emailing me your insights and questions, I LOVE to read them, and I’ll try to answer if possible. But now, I DO read everything you are sending me.
PS: Next week I am hosting a FREE training on Manifestation in English AND in Dutch on the topic: “How to magnetically pull in everything and everyone you desire.”
Manifesting is ALL about energy and becoming MAGNETIC.
Let go of working hard!
Let go of DOING a LOT and never really getting where you want to be.
It’s about connection and surrender!
In this free training, I am going to teach you ALL about 5D manifesting.
It’s going to be AMAZING.
This training WILL be recorded en you WILL receive the replay after signing up, but I am going to share something REALLY special if you are there live, so DON’t miss it!
You can sign up for the English training HERE. (Wednesday, February 20th 8 PM Amsterdam time CET)
You can sign up to attend this training in Dutch HERE. (Tuesday, February 19th 8 PM Amsterdam time CET)
PS 2: In the meantime, have you already gone through THE FREE Ultimate Manifesting program? You can get access HERE.